30 January 2012

Lost and Found

Mr. Sen was not in the best of his moods. There were people everywhere, in every corner of the house. He did not even know the name of half the people sitting around him. But then, he was never good with names. He looked at Ena and thought how old and haggard she looked. He smiled remembering their last meeting. It was 46 years ago. Well, he was older too. And people said that he was senile. What did people know?

Tanima looked at her Grand Uncle. She was afraid yet attracted to him. Her mother had warned her to stay away from Bododadu. He is mad is what her mother had told her. As Tanima stared at him she tried to find traces of the madness but all she saw was an old man with many, many wrinkles. She felt an intense urge to go close to him and count the wrinkles, touch them. He stared back and smiled at her. Tanima shuddered and hid her face in her mother's pallu. No one in the room noticed this exchange.

That little girl looks like Ena when she was younger, must be Ena's grand daughter, Mr. Sen thought to himself. He instantly liked her. Finally, someone in this house who is worth liking, he smiled. Just then, Jhumur asked him his opinion. Mr. Sen realised that they were in the middle of some discussion which he clearly had missed. He just shrugged. Jhumur looked happy and said that all was settled now. The others felt relieved too.

"Is Bododadu mad?" Tanima asked her Thakuma.

Ena was startled. "Of course not, who told you that?"

"Ma." Tanima was happy. She knew her Thakuma could never be wrong.

"Tell me more about Bododadu."

"Your Bododadu was my cousin and my best friend. We grew up in this house and were inseparable. Our friendship alienated us from all our cousins, for them the fact that we never fought made us weird. Today, I think they were jealous."

"Why does Ma not let me go near him? Why does Ma call him mad?"

"He chose to live life on his terms, it made a lot of people unhappy and hostile. They never understood him and so they branded him mad".

"But why were others not happy with him? Why did they want him to be like them? Ma and Babu are different but they don't call each other mad?"

"You are too young to understand it little girl. But know this, Bododadu is not mad. In fact, he is the smartest of all."

                                                          ****************

Mr. Sen was listening to old records when Ena knocked at his door.

"Since when do you need to knock?"

"It is a long time, you know. 46 years."

"I know. But have I changed? No, not for you." He smiled.

"Are you still angry with me?"

"I was. For a very long time, I hated to even hear your name. Perhaps that is why I never replied to any of your letters. But, age also gives you wisdom along with these wrinkles. I am not angry anymore. I understand why you did it."

"I have cursed myself so many times for not having the courage to listen to you. Life could have been so different."

"Don't complain Ena. You have done quite good. Tanima, isn't she your granddaughter? She is pretty, looks like you."

"Yes, she is. Quite a handful. She was asking me the other day if you are mad."

"So, what did you tell her? That Bododadu is the maddest mad". He smiled.

"No. I said that you are brave and smart."

"Pfff. All lies. Do not feed lies into a small girl's head. I was mad. I have always been mad, reckless and see where I am today."

"I wanted to speak to you about that. Why did you agree to sell the house?"

"Sell the house? Who wants to do that? I never agreed."

"Oh Chayan, you will never change. Jhumur asked you at the breakfast table and you said yes."

"So that was what he asked. He he. They want to sell the house. Good."

"You will let them sell this house? This is where we grew up, this is where you spent your life."

"Ena, this house is too big for me. I cannot look after it. It makes more sense."

"You have grown wiser."

"You mean old."

"Yes, we all are. But you are wiser too. So where will you go?"

"I have a small house in the hills. Have never told any of these mongrels. He he. I am smart that way. Will go there, do some gardening, read and wait for death. What about you?"

"Not such a wonderful life. I am the football, passed around my children once every 3 - 4 months. No one likes an old lady."

"Why don't you come and stay with me? It would be more comfortable for you."

"What would they say?"

"Ena, do you still care? You have already given them everything. You deserve to spend the last few years of your life your way."

                                                      **********************

Everyone was assembled at the living room. Ena had called them. There were murmurs in the room.

"I have called everyone here today as I have decided something for myself and I wish to communicate the same to you all."

Jhumur, his wife; Anita and her husband, Deb and his wife all looked perplexed. Everyone hoped that this was not about the house. They had already finalized the buyer and had made plans for the money that they would get. Mr. Sen sat in a corner and smiled at Ena.

"This is not about the house if that is what you are thinking."

There was a collective sigh of relief in the room.

"This is about me, my life. I think I have been a good wife and a mother. Your father is no more and you all have families and lives of your own. I am just a liability."

Jhumur, Anita, Deb all muttered small words of protest.

Ena dismissed them with a wave. "I know and it does not really hurt me. You all are young and have different priorities. So, I have decided that I will be with someone who actually wants me. I will marry Chayan, your Uncle."

Ena's words were met with a pin drop silence. And, then the outrage.

"How can you do this to us?" cried Jhumur and his wife.

"What will we tell others?" screamed Deb

Anita sat with her hands in her head and cried.

"I have decided. I am not seeking your permission. I am just informing." said Ena and left the room. Mr. Sen slowly followed her.

                                                           ***********************

Tanima sneaked into Ena's room. Her mother would beat her if she got caught. But Tanima had to speak to her Thakuma.

"Thakuma, why is everyone so angry with you? Ma has asked me not to talk to you. Bulbul, Tina and Rumon also say bad things about you and Bododadu."

"They will say such things, my dear. DO not pay any heed".

"But, why? I do not like when people say bad things about you."

"I and Bododadu are getting married. So, they are angry with us."

"But aren't marriages happy occassions? When Ranididi got married everyone was so happy. Ma even danced. Why aren't they happy now?"

"Because we are old. Old people do not marry. Also, we are cousins."

"Why can't old people get married? Because you will not look pretty as a bride."

"Ha ha. No, my dear. Well you see there are some rules made by people and we have to follow these rules. Getting married at this age that too to a cousin is going against such rules and so everyone is angry."

"Who made this rules? Why do we need to follow them? When I grow up I will not follow any rules. I will be like you, do what I want to do."

"Do not let your ma hear you say all this or both of us will be in a lot of trouble. run now before she catches you here."

                                                               *************************

Somewhere in the hills a month later

"So, finally after waiting for 72 years, I get to wake up next to you."

"Is that why you never got married Chayan?"

"Why else do you think. I could accept and adjust to everything else. But not waking up next to someone other than you."

She smiled. So did he.







2 comments:

Pooja said...

It's such a beautiful love story, I wish more people had the courage to do something for themselves and not care about what others think. Really lovely.

all that matters said...

Thanks Pooja! Yes, wish we all had the courage to do what made us happy :) Someday, hopefully!